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Posted on in Divorce

St. Charles divorce attorneyWhether you have seen your divorce coming for some time or the realization of your unraveling marriage has taken you by surprise, telling your children, extended family, and acquaintances that your marriage is over is never a pleasant experience. It is not uncommon for friends and family to feel a sense of loss themselves, as they too grew familiar and comfortable seeing you and your spouse together, often over a period of many months or years. Children in the family can take divorce especially hard, making the duty of breaking the news to the kids infinitely more difficult for parents.

Communication is Key

Some divorcing couples make a mutual agreement to tell the children together, while others make arrangements to delegate the “talk” to one parent. Some couples never even have the chance to discuss who will speak to the children about the split because of the conflict and tension surrounding the end of the relationship. Whatever your personal circumstances, consider the following as you tell your kids, friends, and family that you and your spouse are going your separate ways:

  • Get your own emotions in check. Psychology experts emphasize the need for self-care during a divorce, especially when it comes to mental health. Although it is much easier said than done, getting your own emotions in check before you break the news of your separation to your loved ones can help a great deal. Approaching the conversation with a clear head and a calm demeanor can soften the blow, allowing your children and family members to absorb the news. The more in control you appear to be, the better they will receive the news.

Posted on in Divorce

How to Announce Your Divorce Through Social MediaTelling each person you know individually about your divorce can be exhausting and stressful. It also creates many socially awkward situations where the person is not sure how to respond to the news. You would feel relieved if you could just tell them all at the same time. Social media makes this possible in ways that previous generations did not have. However, you must carefully plan out when and how you make the announcement because it will determine how people respond to the news:

  1. Tell Your Closest Friends First: There is no avoiding having a conversation about your divorce with your family and closest friends. They deserve to hear the news from you personally because they may be emotionally invested in your relationship. Think of how you would feel if you learned about your best friend’s divorce through a Facebook announcement. Your friends can also be your allies when making your larger announcement.
  2. Create One Unified Announcement: You can help minimize the drama from your divorce announcement by making it together with your former spouse. Most likely, one of you will write it and send it to the other to get approval before posting it. If your relationship is too strained for this type of cooperation, it is still best to be civil in your announcement and consider how your spouse will react.
  3. Set Expectations with Your Message: You do not need to share intimate details about your divorce, but a short announcement will invite people to respond with questions that you may feel uncomfortable answering. You can give a generic reason why you are getting a divorce or tell people you do not want to talk about. Let people know if you do not want them to ask questions or offer help.
  4. Consider Your Audience: A divorce announcement is appropriate for people who are personal acquaintances. You may use certain social media accounts for professional contacts or more casual acquaintances. Use the social media platform that will only reach the people who you feel need to hear the news. Adjust the privacy settings for your announcement accordingly.
  5. Assign a Spokesperson: You may want to avoid the pressure of responding to people who leave comments on your announcement. You can ask a close friend or family member to respond on your behalf. This person should know how to reply to someone offering help or asking an awkward or inappropriate question.

Contact a Kane County Divorce Attorney

Your divorce announcement should be the only time you talk about your divorce on social media. Your best strategy will be to keep a low profile on social media throughout your divorce so you will not do something that may hurt your case. A St. Charles, Illinois, divorce lawyer at Goostree Law Group can advise you on the proper behavior when going through a divorce. Schedule a free consultation by calling 630-584-4800.


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