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St. Charles IL divorce lawyerThe prospect of divorce is never an appealing one, especially when it feels as though so much is at stake for both parties. From saying goodbye to the relationship and months or years of memories you and your spouse share to dividing belongings and making new living arrangements, the outcome of any divorce, no matter how large or small, results in sacrifice. The experience can be even more emotionally taxing when children and pets are involved, further complicating the question of whether or not to officially call it quits.

Signs You May Be Able to Reconcile

Marriage and family relationship experts identify certain factors that may make reconciliation possible, should both parties be willing to work on the relationship. These include mutual love and trust, good communication, and a sense of safety where both parties are concerned. A sense of safety can manifest itself in a number of ways, including mentally, physically, emotionally, or financially. Other signs that you may be able to salvage your marriage are the presence of shared interests and obvious reciprocal partnership. If you are both faithful to one another, express genuine commitment to the marriage, and possess active, common interests, it may be beneficial for you both to explore the option to stay together.

Indicators it May Be Time to Leave

Some red flags that experts consider unredeemable hindrances to a marriage include a lack of common goals or shared interests, infidelity, and a general lack of trust. The absence of trust harms a partner’s sense of safety and security, and if there is no sense of safety present in the marriage, an ongoing, unhealthy balance exists. A pattern of pathological dishonesty is another big indicator that it may be time to leave. It is usually a combination of these negatives that causes the quality of the marriage to deteriorate over time, finally bringing the unhealthy nature of the relationship to one or both spouse’s attention. For some, the realization hits hard and fast, while it slowly sneaks up on others. 

Posted on in Divorce

When a Serious Illness Leads to a DivorceAs cruel as it may seem, a spouse developing a severe or chronic illness can increase the risk of divorce. Husbands, in particular, are more likely than wives to request a divorce, whether it is during treatment or recovery. Diagnosis of serious sicknesses, such as cancer, puts stress on a marriage, and a relationship that was already weak may not survive. It is important to seek help if you are going through a divorce while also fighting against major illness.

Sources of Stress

Treatment for a serious health problem puts pressure on both spouses. In some cases, the sick spouse may never fully recover, which will permanently change their marriage. Though the supporting spouse may try to remain loyal, he or she may be unable to handle the stress of:

  • Taking on new or increased responsibilities in their marriage;
  • Growing medical expenses related to the illness;
  • The constant need to take care of the sick spouse; and
  • The loss of intimacy and emotional support from the sick spouse.

The marriage may not survive even if the sick spouse makes a full recovery because the experience showed the weaknesses in the marriage. The sick spouse may be the one who asks for a divorce. Surviving a life-threatening illness can motivate people to change their lives in ways that make them happier.

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