call us630-584-4800

Free Consultations

Subscribe to this list via RSS Blog posts tagged in parenting time

Parental Guilt Can Lead to Poor Parenting After DivorceThe effect of divorce on their children is one of the lingering factors that will cause parents to hesitate before separating. It is common for divorced parents to feel guilty about how their decision may be hurting their children. Divorced parents worry that their children:

  • Have been traumatized by the separation;
  • Are stressed by the co-parenting arrangement; and
  • Will resent them for the divorce.

Though children of divorce face hardship, parents are not helping themselves or their children by feeling guilty about it.

Problems with Guilty Parenting

Variables Involved in Parent's Right of First RefusalA parenting plan sets the schedule for when children stay with parents who live apart, but Illinois courts generally presume that separated parents should be able to expand their parenting time when circumstances allow it. That is why some parenting plans include a right of first refusal for each parent. Special circumstances sometimes prevent a parent from being able to watch the children during his or her scheduled parenting time. The right of first refusal requires the unavailable parent to offer the other parent a chance to watch the children before asking a third party. Separating parents may agree to this provision because they know that the children are best off being with one of them. However, there are several variables to a right of first refusal provision that can cause disagreements.

Conditions

It may be impractical for a parent to be required to contact his or her co-parent every time he or she needs childcare. The co-parents must also decide how the transfer of the children would work. A right of first refusal provision includes conditions that clarify when and how the provision is used. This may include:

Taking a Qualitative Approach to Divorce ParentingFiguring out child-related issues during a divorce often requires crunching the numbers. Parents must determine:

  • How many hours the children will spend with each parent during the week;
  • How to divide holidays and special occasions with the children;
  • What their total child-related expenses are; and
  • What percentage of child support each parent is responsible for.

Divorcing parents often come up with the best solutions to these issues by considering the emotional aspects of parenting. Being a good parent takes more than spending time and money. The quality of the parental relationship is just as important towards a child’s emotional development.

Parenting Time

Celebrating Your First Post-Divorce Father's DayJune 18 marks the annual celebration of Father’s Day in the U.S. While it is usually a time for fathers and their children to bond, a newly divorced father may experience the holiday differently. Depending on the parenting time arrangement, his children may be unavailable to visit him that day. If he does get to spend the day with them, he may not know how to celebrate. Past Father’s Day traditions may have relied on the mother’s involvement. Divorced fathers need to take an active role in creating a positive Father’s Day experience for them and their children.

Save the Date

You should talk to your former wife about your desire to spend Father’s Day with your children, especially if it would require altering your parenting time schedule. Parenting time agreements are legally binding, but parents can make minor adjustments without needing court approval. Hopefully, your former wife will appreciate the day’s importance to you and your children. However, you can also help with scheduling by being flexible:

Recognizing Different Parenting Time ViolationsWhen a court rules on parenting time as part of the allocation of parental responsibilities, it is a legally enforceable court order. A parent who violates the agreement may face criminal and civil consequences, including:

  • Fines;
  • Scheduling make-up parenting time for the other parent;
  • Payment of a cash bond to insure against future violations;
  • Probation;
  • Driver's license suspension; and
  • Up to a year in prison after a third offense.

Abuse of parenting time unlawfully reduces the amount of time one parent gets to spend with his or her children. There are multiple methods that parents can use to violate a parenting time agreement.

Withholding Children

Back to Top