Posted on January 17, 2020 in Divorce

According to statistics from the National Survey of Family Growth, around 22% of all marriages end within the first five years, and an estimated 53% of marriages dissolve by the 20-year mark. With these statistics in mind, it is not surprising that divorce is common for Americans. Getting a divorce has been said to be one of the most stressful life events, second only to the death of a loved one. One of the ways you can help alleviate some of this stress is by effectively preparing for the end of your marriage. Here are a few tips to help you get your affairs in order before you begin your divorce:

Get a Clear Picture of Your Finances

First, you should have full knowledge of your financial situation. It is not uncommon for one spouse to be more in tune with the family's finances than the other. However, it is important to be in the loop when it comes to your income, assets, expenses, and other financial matters, since everything will be divided in the end. Make a list of all of your marital assets and debts so you can figure out what you actually own and owe. Next, make a preliminary budget for what you need to live off of after the divorce is said and done. This will help you figure out what you should fight for during the asset division process and whether you might be eligible to receive spousal maintenance.

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 Posted on January 12, 2020 in Children and Divorce

Children can be unpredictable when it comes to how they will react to major events, such as their parents getting divorced. You like to think that you know your child well enough to be able to anticipate how upset they will be, but there is no precedent for them responding to divorce. If your child’s behavior takes a turn for the worse, that will add yet another concern to an already stressful time in your life. Bad behavior for some children is throwing tantrums or behaving rudely. For others, it may be more serious misbehavior that gets them in trouble with school or the law. You need to address your child’s behavior before it becomes a larger problem that creates consequences for them:

1. Maintain Discipline: Do not let your child get away with bad behavior because you feel guilty about the divorce. Your divorce may be the reason they are acting out, but being lax with discipline will encourage their behavior. You should maintain the same rules for behavior and may need to punish your child if their actions warrant it.

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 Posted on January 10, 2020 in Asset Division

Dealing with the marital estate is arguably one of the most difficult aspects of a divorce. Contention over who gets to keep the family home and who gets the money in savings accounts can be the cause of many arguments during the asset division process. One thing to note is that property and assets are not the only things that must be divided during this division process — you must also allocate your debts between the two of you. Allocating debt can prove to be a stressful process, especially since debts created by one spouse may need to be divided between the two of you.

Is it Marital or Non-Marital Debt?

The first thing you must do is determine which of your debts are actually part of the marital estate and which of your debts are personal debts. According to the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act (IMDMA), any property or debts acquired between the day you were married and the day you filed for divorce are considered to be part of the marital estate. If the debt was acquired before you were married or after you filed for divorce, it will probably be considered individual debt. Marital debt can include:

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 Posted on January 07, 2020 in Divorce

It is not enough to wait until after your divorce is over to decide on your post-divorce goals. You should already know what your primary goals are before you start the divorce process so that you can negotiate your divorce with those goals in mind. Once the court has approved your divorce agreement, it will be difficult to modify it if you realize that you missed an opportunity for your agreement to help you achieve a goal. A skilled divorce attorney and a divorce coach can help you identify your divorce goals and plan for how you will achieve them.

Actionable Goals

Most people have a vague idea about what they want from their divorce, but you will be most successful during your divorce if you have specific and quantifiable goals. Saying that you want a “fair share” or a “reasonable agreement” does not tell you how to recognize whether you are achieving your goals. It is more helpful to say that you want:

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 Posted on December 31, 2019 in Divorce Over 50

Going through a divorce is fundamentally the same process for everyone, regardless of their age. You need to divide the life you shared, including the assets you accumulated and the responsibilities you hold. Getting divorced when you are age 50 or older means you will approach some of these issues differently than if you were a younger couple. Your children are likely either adults or getting close to adulthood, which makes child-related issues less of a focus. However, there are other issues that can be more complicated during a gray divorce:

1. Health Insurance: Having good health insurance coverage becomes more vital as you get older and your healthcare expenditures likely increase. Divorce may disrupt your insurance if you are on your spouse’s plan. You need to find your own health insurance source until you are old enough to start receiving Medicare. If you are not eligible for Medicare based on your own work history, you can receive Medicare under your former spouse’s plan as long as you were married for at least 10 years and you have not remarried.

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 Posted on December 31, 2019 in Divorce

While it is true that some couples do not end their marriages on the best of terms, many divorces are amicable, with both partners knowing that divorce is the best option for everyone. Getting a divorce means you will have to make some difficult decisions about your life and your children’s lives. Even though you may not agree on everything, your divorce does not have to be a strenuous process. An uncontested divorce can be preferable and beneficial for everyone involved -- that is, if you are able to cooperate and negotiate with your spouse.

Understanding an Uncontested Divorce

In the most basic of definitions, an uncontested divorce is simply one that is able to be negotiated and settled without the intervention of a court or a judge. There are certain things that all divorcing couples will have to decide before they can complete their divorce. These issues can include:

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 Posted on December 27, 2019 in Alimony / Maintenance

Spousal maintenance that is awarded during a divorce is meant to last for a defined length of time, usually determined by the length of the marriage and the needs of the recipient. In Illinois, maintenance may be permanent if the couple was married for at least 20 years or the recipient spouse has little chance of being able to support themselves. Sometimes, the divorce agreement may state that the parties will review the maintenance after a certain number of years to determine whether it should be extended or terminated. A recent Illinois case, in re Marriage of Brunke, involved two former spouses disagreeing during their maintenance review about whether the maintenance payments should continue and be increased. The court’s ruling on the case explains which factors a court may consider when reviewing a maintenance agreement.

Rehabilitative Maintenance

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 Posted on December 22, 2019 in Divorce

Any divorce professional will tell you that it is beneficial to have an amicable divorce. You save money by having quicker negotiations and feel better about the process after it is over. Unfortunately, there is no guarantee that you will have an amicable divorce because you are only half of the equation. There is little that you can do to change the behavior of a spouse who is hostile towards you from the start of the divorce. Though your divorce will not be amicable, you can still try to make the best of the situations by controlling your own behavior.

Recognizing a High-Conflict Divorce

High-conflict divorce is often characterized by constant combativeness that prevents you from having reasonable discussions with your spouse. The combative spouse could be outwardly angry or silent and uncooperative. People in a high-conflict divorce often:

• Get into arguments over basic issues

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 Posted on December 18, 2019 in Children and Divorce

Your first Christmas after a divorce can be a difficult adjustment for yourself and your children. Parents’ main concern is usually how they will divide parenting time during the holidays so that they both can enjoy it with their children. Gift-giving is another topic that co-parents need to discuss leading up to Christmas. Do not assume that your co-parent has the same idea about what is appropriate regarding the types of gifts you will get your children and their value. You should share your gift-giving duties in the same way as you share other child-related responsibilities and expenses.

Budget

Newly divorced parents can make a mistake by going overboard with Christmas gifts because they feel guilty about putting their children through the divorce. Exceeding your normal budget for your children’s gifts can have harmful consequences:

• You are setting a new expectation for the value and quantity of gifts that your children receive.

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 Posted on December 18, 2019 in Child Custody

 Posted on December 18, 2019 in Child Custody

For divorcing couples with children, a parenting plan must be created before you can tie up the loose ends of your divorce and move on with your life. Illinois courts urge parents to create a parenting plan together that contains all of the provisions and stipulations that they wish to abide by once their divorce is finalized. If you do not come up with a parenting plan, or if you are unable to agree upon one, the responsibility then rests on the courts. A judge, along with a team of professionals, will create a parenting plan for your family, but this often results in one or both of the parents being unhappy with the terms of the agreement.

There are certain commonalities that all parenting plans must share, but parents are given a generous amount of freedom in regards to what can be included in a parenting plan. Here are a few things that may not come to mind right away, but are worth consideration for your plan:

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