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St. Charles IL divorce attorneyThe amount of mental energy couples must expend on the divorce process is often overwhelming, no matter how smoothly the transition unfolds. Divorce scenarios are, in most cases, a mixed bag of events. Some couples sail through the process with mutual respect and civilized interaction, only to discover emotional landmines when they reach the finish line, while other couples struggle with the split from the get-go. Matters can be especially difficult when one spouse refuses to cooperate altogether, leaving the other spouse with all the work and twice the weight in emotional stress.

What Can You Do When Your Spouse Will Not Cooperate?

There are a number of ways someone’s behavior can change throughout a divorce. Sometimes, the change is so drastic, the person becomes nearly unrecognizable to their partner. Some individuals regress, and their behavior can turn so ugly that the divorce becomes flat-out toxic. Even if your divorce has not gone quite to that extreme, you may see a side of your spouse you never knew existed. Experts indicate that people often react differently under severe divorce stress, typically out of self-preservation, which can manifest in many ways including anger or isolation. 

So, what can you do if you are dealing with an entirely uncooperative spouse? Here are some ways you can attempt to diffuse the tension:

Posted on in Mediation

Kane County divorce lawyerAlternative dispute resolution (ADR) can provide a divorcing couple with an efficient, reduced-conflict path to a mutually-satisfying divorce settlement. However, it is not the right choice for every couple. Sometimes, divorcing through an ADR method like mediation or collaborative law can seem like the right choice, but then prove to be impossible for the couple to complete once they actually begin the process. When this happens, the couple must explore other options for completing their divorce. Sometimes, a couple can try ADR again with greater success. In other cases, litigation is the right choice.

Try Working With Another Mediator

When you choose to divorce through mediation, you and your spouse work with a mediator, a neutral third party professional, to reach a mutually agreeable divorce settlement. Mediators are human beings and, as such, not every mediator is a good fit for every couple. You might feel like your mediator has a bias or is not guiding your divorce discussions in a way that makes you feel empowered. If this is the case, it is perfectly acceptable to stop the process and restart it with another mediator.

Posted on in Divorce

Illinois divorce attorney, Illinois family law attorneyGetting divorced can be expensive. Between the meetings with your attorney, the time spent out of work to attend court hearings, and the added expenses of reaching a fair settlement, such as hiring a child custody evaluator or a real estate appraiser, your divorce can quickly become a money pit. For some couples, there is no way to get around these expenses. But for others, there are a few viable ways to reduce the expenses of ending a marriage.

Talk to your lawyer about ways you can save money on your divorce. A good lawyer wants to save his or her clients money and will work with you to find ways to make this possible.

Consider Mediation or a Collaborative Divorce

Posted on in Divorce

divorce mediation, alternative dispute resolution, Kane County divorce attorneyIs there such a thing as a hassle-free divorce? Probably not, given the emotional, financial, and legal difficulties that follow in the wake of a divorce. However, that does not mean you and your divorcing spouse are destined to spend tens of thousands of dollars in court fighting over such trivial questions as who gets the family lawn chairs. In Illinois, there are a number of options to help your divorce be as conflict-free and cost effective as possible.

Mediation in Illinois A growing number of divorcing couples choose mediation. Divorcing spouses in Illinois may choose to use a mediator to help negotiate one or more aspects of their divorce. Mediation has a number of benefits, including the following:
  • Cost Benefits - The mediation process can save you money, especially compared with the prospect of an expensive, drawn-out court battle. You and your divorcing spouse may split the cost of the mediator.
  • Time Savings - Mediation offers a more rapid way to solve your divorce-related disputes than litigation. If you choose to go to court, it can take a year or more just to get a court date, and several years longer if either party appeals the decision. For couples who wish to move past the divorce as quickly as possible and start their new lives apart, mediation is an attractive option.
  • Relationship Preservation - As a less contentious forum than a courtroom, mediation offers an opportunity to negotiate a divorce while still preserving some kind of relationship with your ex-spouse. For divorcing couples who will need to have regular contact even after the divorce--for example, when future decisions will need to be made regarding the care of a child--mediation can help end the marraige on amicable terms.
  • Mutual Satisfaction - The goal of mediation is to reach an agreement that both sides can live with. This differs from the winner-take-all court system, in which each side presents an argument and then the judge decides who wins and who loses. Additionally, mediation offers an opportunity to address extra-legal issues that are not ordinarily susceptible to determination by a court. When couples play a part in negotiating their divorce agreements, they often feel happier about the results.
Even in a Mediation, You Need The Help of An Attorney Even if you choose to use a mediator to help negotiate your divorce agreement, it is essential that you speak with a skilled Illinois attorney. Those individuals who do not understand their rights in a divorce may end up disappointed and hurt from a mediation. Further, an attorney can help you select the right mediator, explain the mediation process, and even attend the mediation with you. Contact a Divorce Mediation Attorney If you are considering divorce and have questions about how to preserve your legal rights while ending your relationship with your spouse as amicably as possible, it is vital that you contact a skilled family law attorney. The professionals at Goostree Law Group are dedicated to helping individuals involved in divorce proceedings understand their rights and reach the outcomes they desire. Contact us today to schedule your free consultation. We work with families in Kane County, DuPage County, Kendall County, and many nearby communities.

Posted on in Uncategorized
Are you experiencing anxiety about moving your divorce case into the traditional court docket? If so, you’re not alone. The courtroom atmosphere can make former spouses feel as if they going to battle against one another, and that simply is not the right solution for every couple who wants to terminate their marriage. This is where mediation can come to your assistance. Mediation allows parties to work with a trained professional to negotiate the terms of their divorce.  If you and your spouse have already come to terms on several major issues about the divorce (like property division or child custody), you can avoid the headaches, emotional toil, and high expenses of going through court. Depending on how busy the judges in your area are, waiting for a court date could also produce significant delays for those spouses who would prefer a legal dissolution sooner rather than later. If you and your spouse are already able to speak amicably about the facts of the divorce, you might not need to go to court anyways. You’ll be much more likely to get an efficient and effective solution for your family with mediation. Even in cases where the parties do not agree on major post-divorce issues have found success with mediation. Research from the 11th Illinois Judicial Circuit shows real evidence that mediation helped child custody disputes by helping 20 percent  to 43 percent of couples reach a partial or full agreement. In mediation, parties communicate with a trained neutral mediator who guides them through options to reach a consensus. If you and your spouse are not able to communicate with one another, or domestic violence has played a role in your relationship, mediation is not recommended. Some couples do attempt mediation and are not able to resolve their differences and have to move forward to court anyways, so if you sense that cooperation is not an option, you’re better off skipping mediation. Working with a talented attorney to set another course of action can be much more effective for you. If you’d like more information about mediation in divorce, contact an Illinois divorce mediator today.
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